they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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