but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Randomize
