doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Randomize
