yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Randomize