I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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