All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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