ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Randomize
