my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Randomize
