you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
