The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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