I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
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