I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
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