My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
