i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
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