Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
We got so high we made milksteak
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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