OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Randomize
