i would punch a child for taco bell
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
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