I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize