you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Someone stole a lamp last night.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Randomize
