Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
