That's intense
So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Randomize
