Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Randomize
