Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize
