Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Randomize
