Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Randomize