wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
You're a waste of cheezeits
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Randomize
