Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Randomize
