my phone needs a breathalizer
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Randomize
