Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize