first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Randomize
