i was born a porn star she said
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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