When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
