Even water is tasting like jack daniels
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
