1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
My life is pants optional.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
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