she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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