My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Randomize
