I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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