she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
