Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
I got chris browned last night
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
