Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
