so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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