I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
