After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
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