this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize
