some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Randomize