She said her name was "party"
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
