If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize