i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
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