using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
