Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
